


Recursion

by ciTohCysP



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: AU, Blood, Children, Domestic, F/M, Gore, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Violence, after the war, eventually, you'll see why - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-08
Updated: 2014-10-08
Packaged: 2018-02-20 08:29:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2421956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ciTohCysP/pseuds/ciTohCysP
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Several years after the end of the war, the blood gulch crew make the long journey back to civilian life, but a mysterious new evil threatens everything they've worked for, and soon it will be up to their children to set everything right.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Recursion

A young girl wearing a dark pink shirt and a frilly purple skirt sat crosslegged next to her bed holding a small box about a foot long and half a foot high. The mysterious box was made completely of steel and had three combination locks on the sides which she excitedly twisted off with practiced ease, but only opened the lid a crack and peered into the shadowy interior with sapphire blue eyes.

“Daisy!” Came a cheerful voice from downstairs that made her look up from her secret box, “Come on! The guests will be here soon!”

“Coming Dad!” The girl yelled, she quickly slammed the lid shut and hastily shoved the box under her bed, leaving it peeking out slightly from under the dangling blanket in haste.

She bolted out from her room and practically tripped down the stairs, her straight shoulder length blonde hair flying out behind her as she sped downward before flying out into the dining room where her father was setting the table with fine silverware and spotless white plates.

The room was heavily decorated in light-ish red chantilly lace and the table was covered in a crisp table cloth and miraculously surrounded by sixteen chairs. She always wondered how he was able to fit that many chairs together around a single table without anyone feeling cramped, his home decorating skill was enough to make the most accomplished home decorators jealous.

“Oh great! You’re here! Could you help me with the balloons?” Her father asked, turning his head slightly to giving her a smile from where he was perched precariously on his tip toes at the top of a folding stepladder, trying to hang colorful streamers from the doorway to the diningroom.

He had short blonde hair that spiked up slightly in the front and clear blue eyes adorned by a small sliver eyebrow piercing and matching stud earrings, he was wearing a light-ish red tanktop and skinny jeans that fit his slight curves a little too well which might have seemed odd to anyone who didn’t know him considering the chilly spring weather.

“Don’t you think your going a bit over board? It’s just a dinner party,” Daisy asked him skeptically.

“Of course not! This is the first time in a while I’ve been able to get everyone together at once, so I’m going to make it absolutely perfect!” He said happily as he reached up a bit too quickly causing the rickety stepladder to sway slightly but he didn’t seem to notice, “First Grif was sick, then Tucker was busy, and then that one time Caboose had a cold… You would almost think they didn’t want to come!” He said with a laugh.

Daisy smiled reassuringly before trotting past the blonde man and into the living room. She scanned the room quickly, looking around the faux leather couches and high bookshelves stocked with yoga and medicinal books before spying the cluster of balloons that varied in shades of pink from wine red to nearly white hiding in the corner, she brightened at the sight of them and reached out to grasp the matching colored strings in a small hand but she stopped short and turned to look when the front door opened suddenly, letting in a cold breeze that made goose bumps pop up on her arms.

“I’m back! And I brought the salad you wanted! You wouldn’t believe the line at the supermarket, it was pretty crazy!” Said a brown haired man in a purple t-shirt and glasses as he shut the front door.

“Hey Doc!” Donut called cheerfully calling his husband by his nickname and stepped down from the wobbly ladder, “I’m almost finished in here, then we can start on the main course!”

“Can I make dessert?” Daisy asked hopping up and down and putting on her best puppy dog eyes as thoughts of balloons completely vanished from her mind.

“You sure can!” Doc said and ruffled her light blonde hair slightly with a bright smile on his face.

“I don’t know, chocolate cake can be pretty messy! Are you sure you can handle it?” Donut asked, playfully teasing her.

“I’m sure!” She said, fake pouting.

Doc picked her up and swung her around, causing Donut to shout at them for almost knocking over his brand new vase, and the three of them went into the kitchen, Daisy held up in Doc’s arms.

~o...o~o...o~o...o~o...o~

“Yay! We’re going to Private Biscuit’s party!” A broad man with golden blonde hair and bright blue eyes exclaimed happily, a handful of faded freckles dotted his cheeks and nose and his navy blue t-shirt failed to hide his muscular form.

“Hooray!” Shouted his son, jumping up and down beside him, “Let’s go to the party!”

Only about five feet away, a man with sharp green eyes, dark black hair, a stubbly goatee, and what seemed to be a permanent scowl painted on his face was walking around gathering up the various messes the two boys had made all around the house and carefully ignoring the conversation the two were having.

“I wonder if there'll be cake?” One said.

“Or ice cream!” The other responded.

Then after a gasp, “Or ice cream cake!”

‘Good god I hope he grows out of this.’ Church thought as he lazily brushed some legos under the rug.

Their son, Chip, certainly inherited Church’s looks with intelligent-looking green eyes and messy raven black hair, but undoubtedly took after Caboose when it came to actual intelligence. The two of them together were enough to conquer the planet with stupidity if they tried.

Church didn’t like the name Chip and thought it sounded stupid beyond belief but it was the best that he could get Caboose to agree to since he was set on naming him Chocolate Chip, either that or Sheila after his god-mother if he were to be a girl.

“You know, we should really bring them a birthday gift.” Chip said thoughtfully.

“Chip, It’s not their birthday,” Caboose corrected him, “It’s a baby shower!”

“I swear to god, either you two need to pick up after yourselves or I’m hiring a fucking maid cause I’m not gonna do this bullshit anymore.” Church said in his usual annoyed tone, deciding to break their line of idiotic conversation before he started losing brain cells from just being near them.

“No! Maids are evil! They will suck out your soul while you sleep.” Caboose said in all seriousness causing Chip to shiver in fear and cling to his father.

“Well I don’t have a soul, so suck it demonic maid lady,” Church said smugly, referring to that fact that he was actually AI fragment placed in a humanoid robot body that Sarge had developed in trade for a favor that may or may not have included Church admitting the non-existent blue team sucked, “wait, why am I arguing with you about this? The point is clean up your own shit.”

“Church! We have talked about this,” Caboose said reaching down and protectively cover Chips eyes, “no swearing in front of the baby!”

“Caboose, your covering his eyes, not his ears,” Church pointed out before turning to grab their shoes and coats out of the closet, “and he’s not a baby, he’s already eleven years old and he doesn’t need you constantly protecting him… If anything I should be protecting you from protecting him! Honestly! How many times do we have to go over the fact that sticking a knife in the electrical outlet won't shoot lightning bolts at bad guys!”

Caboose sniffled completely missing the point, “Yeah, they just grow up so fast!”

“Ugh, just put on your shoes, we need to go soon or else we’ll be late and Donut won't be happy about that.” Church ordered him in an exasperated voice.

“Okay!” Caboose complied happily with Chip following his lead.

“I can’t fucking believe I have two of them now.” Church mumbled under his breath but couldn’t help but smile.

~o...o~o...o~o...o~o...o~

“Ugh, do we have to go to the stupid dinner party?” Asked a plump girl, fumbling with her shoes.

She had long dark brown hair pulled up into a messy high bun and blue eyes with a splatter of freckles across her cheeks, she had a slight tan even though she rarely ever left the house and wore contacts instead of her ‘nerdy glasses’.

“Yeah, we can't keep faking sick forever, plus if we don’t go then kissass over there might fall over and die,” The man across from her said with a smirk, motioning down the hall to where a lanky man with short brown hair and glasses was changing into proper dinner attire.

“I will not!” He shouted from their shared bedroom.

“Well you sure are acting like it!” Grif called back.

“Oh yeah, and just one thing!” Grif yelled to Simmons with a grin on his face, “Shotgun!”

“Fuck!”

The slightly overweight Hawaiian had and dark brown hair and tanned skin with random patches of pale skin here and there which he got from Simmon’s unwilling donation. He had one muddy blue eye and the other was a dull green causing a sort of heterochromia iridum effect.

You could never tell, but he somehow managed to stuff whole boxes of Oreos into his pockets without making a tell tale lump, along with a number of other tricks he claimed he learned from years of practice, but his eleven year old daughter Arya was seriously convinced were magic. One time, he made a snowman in the middle of summer. Seriously! You can’t practice that! It doesn’t even seem physically possible!

“Come on Arya, if we get out of here before he finishes changing, we can probably ditch him!” Grif whispered to his daughter with a sly smile on his face.

“I’m done!” He yelled and opened the door to the bedroom.

“Fuck, we’re too late,” He said with a sigh and Arya cracked a smile, despite how the two quarreled all the time they really did love each other, it was in all the little things.

“So? How do I look?” Simmons asked, stepping into the living room.

He came out wearing a black suit and dress pants with a white undershirt and a maroon tie, his hair slicked back and his glasses polished so they practically shone in the low light. He had a robotic left arm which was mostly covered by his suit, and a metallic patch over his left eye so he had one dull green eye and the other was an electronic red.

For what seemed like several minutes Grif and Arya just stared speechless, for completely different reasons.

“You look… Nice.” Arya said tentatively, well aware of her father’s constant need for approval.

“No.” Grif said finally after pausing a bit too long, though he still had a dazed look in his eyes, “Go change, right now.”

“But this is what you’re supposed to wear to a formal dinner party!” He said defensively.

“The party is informal! It said so on the invitation Donut sent!” Grif argued, referring to the pink piece of cardstock scrawled in hand written calligraphy that had come in the mail a week earlier.

“But if I change now we wont make it in time!” Simmons tried as Grif began pushing him back towards the bedroom.

“Quit arguing and lets get you out of those clothes.” Grif growled quietly into his ear and Simmons make an oh sound shortly before the door slammed shut behind them.

Arya rolled her eyes and turned back to her laptop, ‘Looks like we're gonna be late.’

~o...o~o...o~o...o~o...o~

“So we’re going to Frank and Franklin’s dinner party, right?” Asked a small boy, using Doc and Donut’s first names.

He had piercing green eyes with a ring of light brown in the center enclosing his pupil and fiery red hair that was cut short so it was about an inch long. He was only ten years old but the way he spoke and held himself he seemed more like thirteen despite his short stature.

“Yep, and your cousins will be there too.” His father told him in a happy tone as he combed through his short sandy blonde hair, he had brown eyes like his sons and a battle worn face that if you looked close enough you could see small faded scars from previous battles long past.

“Daisy, Arya, and…” He trailed off, trying to think of his last cousins name.

“Chip.” His father reminded him.

“Oh yeah,” He said dryly, recalling the black haired idiot.

“And Junior will be there too,” His crimson haired mother added as she rounded the corner, Wash kissed her on the cheek and she pretended not to notice, “so Missouri, you need to be on your best behavior.”

“Yes mom,” Missouri droned per usual.

His mother, Carolina, had sharp green eyes and beautiful red hair that flowed down her back in a ponytail. She wore a teal tank top and short tan cargo pants that showed off her lithe figure perfectly.

“Wait, Junior? I thought he was…” Wash trailed off, apparently asking the rest of his question telepathically like most couples managed to do when they were talking about something secret around their children.

“Yes, but he’s… On break. Apparently he’s staying with Tucker while he’s on his vacation.” She replied cryptically.

“Oh,” Was all he said in reply, apparently mulling over whatever ‘vacation’ meant.

Missouri wasn’t blind, he knew his parents were in the military, in fact he had the dog tags around his neck to prove it, and he also knew there was more to it than what they were telling him, but everytime he brought up the subject it was carefully and skillfully avoided. He once heard them talking one night, something about a Director and Freelancers, but he couldn’t hear much else without getting caught. Slowly, but surely, he planned to gather up all the bits and pieces and figure out whatever it was his parents were hiding, but it would certainly take some time, and if he was too forceful then the whole plan would fail.

In the following silence they each carried out their own routines, Carolina applied a small amount of flashy dark blue eyeliner, just enough so that it was hardly noticeable, Wash stood and walked quietly to the kitchen, making sure the community cat bowl was filled enough for the evening out of the house, it really was surprising how much five cats could eat in a few hours, and Missouri collected his shoes, brushing the yellow cat with a pink bow named Nyanperowna away from his favorite spot curled up next to the heating vent on top of the shoes so he could pull his black combat boots from the mass of every kind of footwear from slippers to cleats all piled haphazardly by the door.

Long silences like this were not uncommon in their household, but Missouri didn’t mind, in fact, he welcomed them. They often took place right after a secretive topic was discussed so even if the conversation was heavily masked with code words and implied communications the telltale silence that persisted afterwards always gave it away.

“Are you ready to go?” Carolina asked them, effectively lifting the heavy mood.

“Just let me grab my phone,” Missouri said and reached for his smartphone which was sitting on the coffee table in front of the couch.

“Do you really need that thing? If you bring it you’ll just be checking your Basebook the whole time and not interacting with your relatives,” Wash said, referring to the Reds and Blues a their family, even if the only actual connections was that Church was a fragment of a copy of Carolina’s father, though the kids just knew them as siblings.

“Wa- David.” Carolina scolded him, stumbling over his name. She had a lot of difficulty transitioning to civilian life since she basically grew up in the military and Doc had suggested she try calling everyone by their first names to help her ‘get back into the feel of things’, and as much as she didn’t trust the incompetent medic’s judgment, she was willing to try just about anything.

“What? I was against him even getting one in the first place, too much exposure to the world can be bad for you,” Wash argued, not helping the everlasting argument that he was too overprotective, “You never know what kind of people could be out there!”

“Come on,” Carolina said with a sigh as she practically pushed him out the door, “Let’s get out of here before we’re late.”

Missouri smiled his thanks to his mom and followed the two of them out the door, smartphone in hand and a smile touched on his lips.

~o...o~o...o~o...o~o...o~

“Sup assholes!” Tucker called as he all but kicked the door down with Junior following close behind.

“Hey Tucker!” Doc greeted him with a warm smile just as he placed a bag of pita chips and some hummus dip on the table.

“Uncle Tucker!” Daisy yelled as she broke from Donut’s side as he had a one sided conversation with an annoyed looking Church, and Chip trailed close behind her.

“Hey little guys! What’s up?” He greeted them with a hug.

Missouri, noticing the new addition, tapped Arya on the shoulder and stalked over towards them. Arya turned to see him walking away before her attention caught on the dark skinned, black haired man by the door with soft chocolate brown eyes accompanied by a child sized alien. Arya was still wearing her fluffy maroon slippers from before she left the house, not bothering to put on any actual shoes for the short drive across town to Daisy’s house.

“Hey Missouri, Arya.” He said with a smile to them as they approached albeit more cautiously than their other cousins at the sight of the unfamiliar creature.

“Honk honk blarg!” Junior said incomprehensibly and looked to Tucker.

“Oh yeah!” He said, perking up as he remembered something he had forgotten, “Everyone, meet Junior. He’s my son.”

“Blarg,” The small blue and teal alien said in a language apparently only Tucker could understand.

Missouri simply looked at him and tilted his head slightly while Daisy bounced forward happily and said, “Hi Junior! I’m Daisy! Day-zee!”

Chip soon followed her example, leaning in close and poking at the alien’s tough outer plating curiously. Arya took a few steps forward but made sure to be in a spot where she could make a break for it and ditch the others if need be.

While the kids introduced themselves to the stranger, Tucker went off to reunite while his old friends. Specifically butting in on the conversation between Donut and Church who looked like he was about to punch a hole through the wall if he had to listen to one more double-entendre.

“Miss me?” Tucker asked with smug arrogance overflowing from each word.

“Miss you? We just say you last week.” Church said bitterly, his tone holding the same annoyed edge was ever.

“Not me! You guys never let me come to poker night!” Donut said, pouting.

Every monday at Church’s house was poker night for Tucker, Church, Grif, Sarge, and Wash, Caboose was there too most of the time, but they just gave him go fish cards because he didn’t understand the game, but somehow he always ended up with the most chips in the end regardless. Donut had been excluded from their weekly activity after an embarrassing round of strip poker that they were to this day unsure how he talked them into and had voted unanimously to never speak of ever again.

“Wait, you guys have been having poker night without me?” Simmons exclaimed from where they hadn’t noticed he was idly listening to their conversation a few feet away.

“Yeah, and it’s awesome. Wanna know why? Cause it’s the one time I can get away from you!” Grif yelled from the other side of the room where he had miraculously struck up a conversation with Carolina.

Wash, noticing his past teammate, politely ended his conversation with Doc and the two of them walked over to the other’s constantly expanding circle of conversation.

“So, are we gonna eat soon or what?” Tucker asked to no one in particular, “‘Cause I’m starving.”

“We’ve gotta wait for Sarge to show up, he hasn’t gotten here yet,” Donut told them in his usual joyful tone.

“Well if he’s not here in the next five minutes, I’m eating his food for him,” Grif said, having given up trying to hold a conversation with Carolina without getting kicked in the balls.

‘Like mother like daughter...’ He thought to himself, because saying it aloud was equivalent to signing a death warrant.

“Excess consumption of rations! Sounds like insubordination to me!” Said the familiar gruff voice and southern accent of the ex-sergeant of the red team as he made his perfectly timed entrances followed reluctantly by a brown humanoid robot.

“Fuck you! You're not my commanding officer anymore!” Grif yelled rebelliously at the gray haired and battle scarred man.

“Good to see you sir!” Simmons said brightly at the sight of his old leader.

“Oh fuck you too Simmons.” Grif said without enthusiasm.

“Finally! We can eat!” Tucker rejoiced overdramatically.

“Yeah! Dig in everybody!” Doc said as he and Donut brought out dishes of fish, mashed potatoes, and vegetables, “And fish is good for your diet!”

“Pardon our lateness, Senior el Robot here had some trouble with the car,” Sarge said motioning to the brown robot.

“Yes, because this is all my fault. I am definitely the one who decided it would be a good idea to use parts from the car to build a levitation ray that doesn’t even fucking work.” Lopez said, his tone heavily laden with sarcasm.

“Yeah, you really should be more careful with your machinery next time Lopez!” Donut said, misinterpreting his words, “Even cars appreciate a good lube job every now and then!”

“Kill me.”

Soon everyone was seated comfortably around the table though the Reds and Blues seemed to naturally gravitate to opposite sides, Doc sitting on the Red’s side of the large table next to Donut, and Carolina with the Blues by Wash, yet their casual conversation resumed despite the color division.

“So Michael, how’s Lieutenant Biscuit going?” Wash asked, moving the topic of conversation to Donut and Cabooses newly opened bakery and sweet shop.

“It’s great! We make cakes!” He said, bouncing slightly in his seat.

“Well, technically I make cakes and you put the frosting on top,” Donut corrected him in a happy tone.

Church huffed, “I’ll tell you how it’s going, we opened a week ago and already we owe over a thousand dollars in debt because Michael kept fucking up the cakes!” He raged, he was rightfully angry as he handled all the small shops funds when he wasn’t working part time in customer service, he didn’t like the customers and the customers certainly didn’t like him but it was one of the few jobs that was hiring around town.

Caboose sighed fondly as he recalled the memory of dozens of cakes burned to a crisp, “Yeah, that’s why I do frosting now!”

“Oh don’t be so pessimistic Leonard!” Donut said with a smile before turning back to Wash to change the subject before Church went into a full on rant, “So how’s your gym going?”

“Oh it’s great! Business has been good and all considering Carolina’s harsh training sessions,” Wash responded, throwing a glance at his wife.

“Hey, if they can’t handle it, they can leave.” Carolina said crossing her arms as if she was mad at the clients for not being able to survive advanced super soldier training without backing out.

“Yeah, it hasn’t been too difficult to manage, i’ve even had time to volunteer at the pet shelter every weekend!” Wash added, thinking of the small cat and dog shelter where he got his five cats back when they were kittens much to Missouri’s amusement and Carolina’s distaste.

“And here we are talking about jobs when Dexter has yet to get one,” Simmons said, jumping into the conversation.

“Hey! You’re job as a hacker makes enough for the three of us,” Grif retorted, defending his case.

“I’m not a hacker! I’m a programmer!” Simmons bickered with his husband, his voice steadily rising.

“Well someone has to stay home and watch Arya!” He argued dully.

“That’s Doc’s job! He’s the babysitter! He watches Arya, Chip, Missouri, and Daisy while you sit on your fat ass!” Simmons bit back.

“Well at least I-”

Doc interrupted Grif, hoping to avoid an all out war between the two of them, “So Sarge, I heard you opened an auto repair shop?”

“Yep! Sarge’s Auto body! If you ain’t blue, we’ll see what we can do!”

“That slogan is so stupid.” Lopez complained, but was ignored completely by the others.

“Me and Lopez can fix anything from a jeep to a tank, not that anyone around here brings in tanks, mostly just damned civi vehicles,” Sarge said his tone creeping on disappointment.  
The children knew better than to interrupt their parents while they were talking, they mostly just scarfed down the amazing food that had been set in front of them while they listened intently to the conversation as it was passed around the table from one adult to another.  
“So Lavernius, what are you up to nowadays?” Sarge asked the previously aqua soldier.  
“I just work in human alien relations with Junior,” Tucker said nonchalantly and Carolina gave him a look that screamed ‘watch it’ but he didn’t seem to get the message, “You know, but it’s been hard not getting to see him much these past few years, they just grow up so fast!”  
“Yeah, I’m sure being worshiped is hard work,” Grif said sarcastically and Carolina shifted her glare-of-death to him but he didn’t seem to notice, or maybe he just didn’t care.  
“Yeah, isn’t he like the leader of a-” Church started but was cut off when Carolina practically threw her chair backwards when she stood up with lightning speed and slammed her hands down on the table.  
“Okay! Why don’t we all continue this conversation in the living room,” She said normally which had an almost eerie effect when it didn’t match up with her rash actions, “Kids, why don’t you go play upstairs in Daisy’s room.”  
“But auntie!” Chip protested weakly but Missouri was already out of his seat, he knew it was best not to argue with his mother when she got like this.  
“Right. Now.” Carolina said slowly her tone like steel.  
“Yes miss Carolina, right away!” Arya said and grabbed the oblivious Chip’s wrist and dragged him towards the stairs that lead to the upstairs of the house.  
Daisy was the last to follow and bolted up the stairs while the adults shifted uncomfortably in their chairs, all very well aware of the earful they were going to get from the ex-freelancer about their recklessness and immaturity like they did almost every week for one reason or another.  
As the four children ascended the steep stairs they could hear the fading voice of Caboose say, “Is the mean lady going to yell at us again?”  
“Well that was… Interesting.” Arya commented dryly as she plopped down on the plush pink comforter that covered Daisy’s bed.  
“What do you think all that was about?” Daisy said and looked to the others questioningly but Arya just shrugged.  
“I think, that Minor is the king of the universe and he is in trouble.” Chip said in low tones with complete seriousness.  
“You mean Junior?” Daisy asked, tilting her head slightly like she did when she was confused.  
“Probably.” Chip responded simply.  
The room was small but cozy and absolutely covered in pink, from the paint on the walls to the oval shaped shaggy carpet covering most of the hardwood floor. The only furniture was a twin sized bed, a dresser, and a small chest that housed most of her toys and stuffed animals.  
“Actually, what do you guys think they were talking about?” Daisy asked, carrying on Chip’s speculation, “Something about that alien, Junior…”  
Missouri often didn’t like to discuss his theories but he saw the chance to glean some information and he took it, “Dexter said something about him being worshiped, and Leonard said he was the leader of something before he was cut off by Carolina.”  
“Maybe... Minor is the religious leader, of an alien religion, by a procephy made thousands of years ago!” Chip exclaimed excitedly.  
“No.” Missouri said shortly, “The real question is how he and Lavernius are related, he says the alien is his son but I don’t buy it.”  
“Is he adopted?” Daisy asked.  
“Possibly, but if he is then he couldn’t be some religious figure.” Missouri said with a shake of his head.  
“Why not? I don’t see how being adopted is a bad thing,” Daisy said and unconsciously tilted her head to the side as she thought.  
“No, not like that… Think about it like this, what culture would let some prothesized kid get adopted by a member of another race? It just wouldn’t make sense.” Missouri ran a hand through his short red hair and sighed.  
‘This is gonna give me a headache… Just remember, try to get as much information from them without giving out much of your own, just like mother taught you.’ He thought, recalling one of the basic lessons his mother had taught him from a young age in case ‘he ever needed it’.  
Manipulation and stealth had been his first lessons, though he had never been very good at lying, after that came the more advanced lessons which involved all kinds of knives and more than one trip to the shooting range two towns over.  
“But why would they hide this stuff from us?” Daisy asked, sounding somewhat hurt, “They should just tell us what’s going on so we can help!”  
Missouri resisted the urge to chuckle humorlessly as he replied, “I’m sure whatever military business they got themselves into in the past is way beyond our comprehension.”  
“They were in the military!?” Chip’s eyes went wide as sauser plates and Arya gave him a look that said, ‘Are you fucking kidding me.’  
Missouri’s intimidating green eyes went dark as he spoke ominously, “More than just the military. Far more.”  
There was a short silence and Missouri scanned the faces around the room for signs of reaction. Daisy looked sullen, almost disappointed that her parents felt she wasn’t ready to know everything they knew, Chip held his usual blank but cheerful expression but he wasn’t even hoping to get anything from him, and Arya was obviously trying desperately to hold back the broad grin that tugged at the corners of her lips and shone in her eyes.  
“Arya,” He said, calling attention the to the odd girl, “You’ve been awfully quiet though all this for someone who usually never shuts up.”  
“Hmm? Oh it’s nothing,” She dismissed it with a casual wave of her hand, then added, “you all just look so cute when you're trying to figure something out, like little detectives.”  
She was now smiling mockingly, no longer even trying to hide it, but at very least she refrained from snickering like she would if they were anyone besides the friends she had known for literally her whole life.  
“Don’t act so high and mighty,” He said authoritatively, “your the same age as us, so you're in the same boat.”  
“No, I’m a year older than you,” She said with a smirk, “Chips a year and a half, and Daisy’s the oldest, so really, that insult only applies to you, little detective.”  
Missouri was practically bristling now but his sharp comeback died in his throat as Daisy moved to stand between the two of them, holding her hands up like a traffic cop, “Stop it! Both of you!” She screeched, making them both freeze.  
Though she was the oldest of them, Daisy was certainly the most mild mannered and empathetic, she was the kind of girl who would cry at the end of Bambi no matter how many times she watched it. She generally acted like the youngest despite her being born nearly half a year before any of the others, so when Daisy raised her voice, everyone stopped to listen.  
“Arya! That’s mean!” She said reeling to face her friend with tears brimming in her soft blue eyes, “And Missouri! You know better!”  
“S-sorry,” Missouri said suddenly feeling ashamed of rising to Arya’s bait.  
“Yeah, sorry,” Arya agreed, turning her head so she didn’t have to look into Daisy’s puppy dog eyes.  
“I’m sorry!” Chip said to, even though he probably didn’t have a clue what was going on.  
A heavy and extremely awkward silence fell over the room and the only sound was the faint yelling of Carolina scolding the others downstairs, “How can you possibly be this stupid!”  
Then Missouri got an idea.  
“The fuck are you doing?” Arya asked raising an eyebrow as she watched Missouri get on his knees and press his ear against the wood floor boards.  
“Shut up, I’m trying to listen to them talk,” He said shortly which caught Daisy and Chips attention as well.  
There was a long moment of total silence as the others strained to hear the conversation raging on downstairs as well but could only make out bits and pieces of when Carolina raised her voice, “...You idiots!”  
After a while Missouri gave up and leaned back on his legs, settling into a comfortable kneeling position, “It’s no use, nothing good anyways.”  
“Nothing good?” Daisy asked innocently, not catching the meaning behind his words.  
“Are you kidding? This is comedy gold!” Arya said playfully with a grin, she knew full well what Missouri was trying to do, but she simply found it was more entertaining this way.  
“Hey… What’s this?” Missouri asked as his eye caught on a glimpse of metal peeking out from beneath Daisy’s bed.  
He reached out and dragged out the mysterious foot long steel box, the padlocks left undone from hours before. Missouri looked up at Daisy who seemed to be frozen in place, her happy expression was locked in but her eyes shining with terror. He arched a single red eyebrow before turning back to the heavy box, moving to push open the sliding lid and see inside the protective box.  
Suddenly she shook her head as if awaking from a trance and practically pounced on Missouri, swiping the cold box from his grasp in a smooth motion and forcing the padlocks shut in rapid succession, each click reinforced with a frantic, “Nope! Nope! Nope!”  
They all stared at her bewildered as she cradled the box close to her chest so she almost resembled a dog protecting a bone, only a short step away from uncharastically baring her teeth at them and growling.  
“Well okay then…” Was all Arya could come up with, seeing her friend since birth acting so strangely.  
‘Whatever’s in that box must be really fucking special… Or maybe Daisy’s just going crazy.’ Arya thought, her mind trailing back to an old story she had once heard where something similar happened, but she severed the chain of thought quickly and pushed the mental image from her brain.  
“Maybe we should go back downstairs, it sounds like Mrs. McCrabby calmed down…” Said Chip, using the name Caboose always called her when talking about Carolina and drawing a snicker out of Arya.  
“Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.” Missouri said slowly, still watching Daisy’s odd behavior as he stood up and backed away towards the door out of her room.  
‘Breaking out in tears, that’s normal. -Well, at least for Daisy- But this...This is new...’ Arya thought as she trudged after Missouri, leaving Chip alone with their apparently crazy friend.  
When she reached the bottom of the stairs she saw Missouri had stopped in the doorway and was peeking around the corner, trying to see into the living room without being spotted.  
Arya gave him a look and said, “What are you doing now?”  
He held up a finger to shush her and then cupped a hand around his ear indicating for her to listen. She rolled her eyes but did what he said, straining her ears to listen to the distant conversation in the livingroom where all the adults were gathered.  
“A-and you're sure?” Wash said sounding slightly afraid.  
“Dude, I know what I saw,” Tucker answered calmly.  
“Oooooh shit.” Simmons muttered.  
Missouri felt his pulse quicken, ‘Finally, some good info! It seems they’re more open about their past when they’re together...’  
“But who would…” Donut trailed off.  
Church picked up where he left off and asked, “...Do you think it’s the director?”  
Missouri’s attention caught on the recurring name of the mysterious stranger, ‘There’s that name again… The Director. He’s mentioned in virtually every private conversation they have.’  
“No.” Carolina responded sharply, “He’s long dead.”  
‘He’s… Dead?’  
“I meant, what if it’s someone who want’s revenge for him?” Church corrected himself.  
“Like who?” Grif questioned skeptically, “I’m pretty sure no one stuck around after what happened.”  
‘After what happened...’ He mulled over the possible meanings behind the cryptic response.  
“Besides Florida, that backstabber.” Wash added grimly.  
‘Florida… Another state name.’ Missouri thought, ‘State names seem to be very common in their past, Florida, Maine, Wyoming… Mom sometimes calls dad Wash, could that be Washington? I think I heard York and CT once, those would probably be New York and Connecticut… Dad said something about Texas that really set mom off, and Maine pops up a lot as well, but what do they mean?’  
“You mean Captain Flowers?” Church asked, referring to the ex-freelancer by his Blood Gulch name.  
“Nah, he’s dead for sure,” Tucker told them, “after all, not many people come back from the dead twice.”  
‘C-come back from the dead!? Twice?!’ Missouri’s mouth hung agape as the conversation continued.  
“Yeah, cause that method of thinking has been very successful in the past.” Church snorted.  
“Oh that’s rich coming from-” Tucker started but was cut off by an agitated Carolina.  
“Focus!” Carolina ordered and everyone went quiet, “This is important.”  
‘What’s going on! None of this makes any sense!’ Missouri struggled to stay focused on the ridiculous conversation at hand.  
“C-could it be one of the AI?” Doc asked after a moment of hesitation.  
“AI… What’s the A stand for?” Caboose asker after a pause.  
‘AI… Like an artificial intelligence?’ Missouri thought.  
“No, they all died in the blast from the EMP… Well, all except one.” Wash said, ignoring Cabooses question.  
“And thank god for that,” Church said with a sigh.  
“Who was it? Who survived?” Caboose said, his voice rising frantically, “Was is O’malley? It was O’malley wasn’t it!”  
“No Caboose! Epsilon survived, I survived. You were there! You were the one who brought me back!” Church said impatiently.  
‘L-leonard… Is a what!’ Missouri could feel the beginnings of a headache, ‘This doesn't make any sense!’  
“But if it’s not that Director guy or any of the AI-thingys, then who?” Sarge said speaking up for the first time in the conversation.  
“Are there any of those scary freelancers left?” Simmons asked, his voice cracking slightly at the thought of the Meta.  
“If by ‘scary’ you mean ones you managed to piss off enough that they’d want you dead,” Carolina said with a slightly agitated tone, “then just me.”  
“No, we’re the last.” Wash translated for her.  
‘Freelancers… Is that a gang name? Or a branch of the military?’ Missouri rifled through his memory, trying to recall where he’s heard that name before.  
“Alright guys, think. Who else did you manage to piss off?” Carolina asked the whole group.  
“Why does it have to be one of us, sis?” Church interrupted before could reply, “Maybe it was one of your old insurrectionist buddies, they seemed nice.”  
Then Grif cut in, “Ugh, could you please not call her sis? It’s really weird!”  
‘Weird? Why is it weird?’ Missouri thought in confusion. As far as he knew, Church and Carolina were brother and sister.  
“Would you prefer if she called me dad?” Church suggested sarcastically and Grif mumbled something under his breath but didn’t say anything else.  
‘D-dad!’ Missouri was on the verge of screaming in confused frustration, ‘But I thought they were siblings!’  
“Drop it, okay?” Carolina said coldly before continuing, “The insurrectionists disbanded with the fall of their leader. Besides, their main goal was to collect alien artifacts, not bring down Freelancer.”  
“Blarg!” Junior said incomprehensibly, sounding angry, “Honk blarg honk honk! Blarg… Blarg!”  
“Well then who could it be?” Tucker exclaimed sounding frustrated.  
There was a lull in the conversation as they all scoured their memories for anyone else who could possibly want them dead. Daisy and Chip chose this opportune moment to descend the stairs, the dull thud of each footfall seeming too loud in the deafening silence.  
‘Well shit, looks like the gigs up.’ Missouri thought with a sigh, ‘If they stop at the bottom of the stairs the grown-ups will know and then they’ll figure out what we’re doing.’  
When Chip and Daisy reached the bottom of the stairs the four of them emerged together from the doorway seamlessly, making it look like the had come down together. Daisy shot the two of them a question glance when she noticed they were spying on the adults but they reflected it right back at her, silently asking what her erratic behavior was all about, but she just looked down at her feet and her cheeks went red with embarrassment.  
“Can we come back down now?” Chip winned, “It’s boring up there!”  
“Yeah, of course! We were just talking,” Tucker lied effortlessly with a smile.  
Internally Missouri narrowed his eyes at his nonchalant attitude as his mind swirled with new and impossible information, but on the outside he kept up his placid demeanor.  
“Carolina?” Wash said expectantly, turning to his wife.  
She huffed but relented saying, “I’m sorry I snapped at you.”  
“That’s alright Mrs. McCrabby!” Chip said with a silly smile and everyone else flinched, expecting the worst from Carolina, “It’s okay if you don’t want to tell us about top secret stuff! Like super secret cake recipes.”  
Doc laughed nervously but soon after that the normal chit chat carried on like it usually did, though Missouri couldn't push the thought of AI and the mysterious Freelancers out of his head.  
For a while he just stared at Church, studying the way he moved, the way he scowled, the way he smiled and rolled his eyes when Caboose came up to him asking him to help open a can of pop.  
‘An artificial intelligence? It can’t be possible! He looks and acts like a normal person…’ He thought of Lopez but that was different. Lopez was clearly a robot from the way he talked and moved, but Church seemed completely human, ‘But they talked about it like it was nothing. Like it was normal.’  
His thoughts were a whirlwind of confusion as he attempted to make connections between this boatload of new information and all the other scraps and pieces he had gathered over the years, then sort it out so it made sense but it was all just so chaotic, like a spider web that stretched for miles and miles but almost all the strands were missing.  
Soon he gave up the hopeless endeavor for the time being, perhaps one of the other kids had the missing puzzle pieces he needed but he would have to wait till he could talk to them alone, so for now why not enjoy the party.  
~o...o~o...o~o...o~o...o~  
Much, much later that night Arya was back home with Grif and Simmons, tucked in under a thin but warm blanket on the futon that acted as her bed most days when she didn’t feel like sleeping in her messy room.  
“Goodnight, hon,” Grif said as he tucked her in and kissed her on the forehead.  
“Hey dad,” She grabbed his arm as he turned to go to bed himself, a sly grin plastered sleepily on her face, “You guys should really be more careful, Missouri heard your whole conversation at the party.”  
He gave her a gentle glare before saying, “No, you should be more careful, after all it’s your job to keep them out of trouble, that’s why we told you all those stories. I’m not so worried about Chip or Daisy, but Missouri is like a mini freelancer, lord knows what kind of trouble he could get into trying to snoop around for some information.”  
“Yeah yeah, but I can’t do much to stop him if you guys are running your mouths off and he just so happens to be hiding around the corner, it’d just be plain suspicious if I tried to stop him then he’d stop trusting me and you’d lose your inside source.” She explained, waving her hand in a circle vaguely.  
He sighed and a smile touched his lips, “You’re just like your dad, you know that?”  
She rolled her eyes, “You tell me every day.”  
“Goodnight,” He said and kissed her again.  
“Goodnight,” She whispered as he walked away.

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this on FanFiction.net first but they don't allow imports so shhhhhhh! Comments are just about the best thing in the world to me so if you like it please comment!


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